“Your body is wrong,”
This is the message of nearly all of the marketing we consume.
If you felt good in your body, you wouldn’t buy all the supplements, shapewear, face creams, and gym memberships to feel better.
This type of marketing works well and has been pervasive for decades. Even being aware of the tactics, it is difficult not to fall prey to them.
I have been reading several articles regarding Victoria’s Secret whistleblowers’.
The story is upsetting.
To summarize, the millionaire friend of Jeffery Epstein based his marketing on top models rewarded for starving themselves into bodies that look like a 14-year-old girl from the neck down.
Their vast profits relied on men and women adapting the idea that the most desirable women look like “angels” and that some women naturally look this way effortlessly.
Everyone is lower on the yardstick of worthiness.
Yet, with a stop in the mall, you can have a small part of this magical world by buying bras and panties.
Many models are now speaking up about the abuse they tolerated to fit into the “Angel” mold.
Of course, now, we all have become our own worst enemies with social media.
The enemy is no longer a handful of paedophiles in suits with money and power.
But we are stuck with disabling beliefs that if you suffer enough, have enough willpower, and force yourself to tolerate self-punishment, you can accomplish angel status anywhere in your life.
All the “you shoulds” are marketing, creating a desire to be different in a way that must feel better over there instead of where you are right now.
We even feel bad about not feeling “body positive” enough, which quickly divulges into “what is wrong with me?”
Stop being a consumer of this nonsense.
Stop mentally buying into the body-shaming nonsense.
Look up, get off your phone for a moment, take a deep breath, and “be.”
A few inhales of stillness can be very uncomfortable if you are so used to beating yourself up all the time.
It is possible that what is on the other side of ending consumerism is peace, air, and sunshine.
It is there, already waiting for you.
Your body is yours to care for, your gift, your life.
It is so obviously simple, but we make it so hard, and being sold the idea that we are “not enough” is pervasive, not just from the media but our parents, ex-boyfriends, girlfriends, and families.
That stuff is hard to shake, so give your brain some time to relearn this. (This is where hypnotherapy is incredibly healing).
Since I cannot hypnotize you from a blog,
Here are four mindfulness ways to start loving your body.
1. Care for the inner child.
If you were in charge of nurturing that child, you would stop punishing it all the time.
You would want to give it water, nourishment, and an occasional treat.
You do not wish to poison it.
Taking a nap when that child is tired is not a guilty pleasure, but makes sense to honor it.
Give it an ice cream on a summer night.
Nothing has gone wrong when it wants a treat from time to time.
Do you want to force your 30, 40, 50 or 60-year-old body to look and behave like a 24-year-old?
Permit yourself, sans criticism, to be your age.
Fighting reality wastes your precious time.
3. Have a beginner’s mind.
Being a beginner means being willing to make mistakes and learn with curiosity.
It is impossible to hold onto shame and self-punishing if you are curious and experimental.
If you learn to eat or treat yourself without shame or punishment, it will feel new and uncomfortable at first.
4. Learn that life is 50/50.
Life is full of emotional and physical pain, but when you allow for this, you realize that the difficult 50% is only temporary.
We are not supposed to feel great all the time. When we are not in such a hurry to jump away from the discomfort, it ironically makes it go away faster.
Being hungry is not such an emergency that needs to be solved with a snickers bar, but a quick way to be until you find the food that nourishes you.
It also helps you not use food, alcohol or cigarettes to fill a “void” that is uncomfortable.
Allow for the restlessness and I promise, some peace is on the other side.